Bittersweet end of IB 18-05-2016 (Português/English)

 Before anything else, warning to the piece of art below:




Yeah. Finish today at 11.55 AM, Berlin timezone of 18/05/2016.

I just finished my exams today, what make me so delighted. I cannot even think my UWC life is dripping among my fingers and I cannot retain it. 

Às vezes eu tenho esse sentimento de que dá para empacar sentimentos como nós empacamos roupas. A mesma sensação de ouvir uma música de muito tempo atrás que reaviva as memórias do passado. Não quero visita-los agora, mas certamente é preciso escrever, pois otherwise que memórias pra coletar nos anos que virão?

Hoje eu tive o prazer de terminar meu último exame. Um wunderbar anthropology paper. Ontem eu fiquei eufórica quando vi em meio ao emaranhado de palavras no texto do paper 1, as palavras Amazon and Soccer saltaram aos olhos. Um brasileiro tinha que regozijar com um dos fatores proeminentes de seu background.

Mas voltando ao que eu falava. ACABEI. GENTE, IB ACABOU. Não tive que retornar à library assim que acabei meu exames. (Library foi nada menos queque foi praticamente minha casa durante meu segundo ano aqui no Bosch )

''Do you have 5 minutes left to the end of this examination, make sure that you draw a line over all the work you do not want to be read by the examinators.''

The typical phrase being repeted in all exams.

Today I thought... those are not just the five minutes left in which I am supposed to revise the whole thing. THOSE ARE MY LAST IB MINUTES.

Sara, my former math teacher said during lunch that it had a quite metaphorical sense. In addition, if we think deep, she is right. I wish I had been a more interested student last year. I could have taken so much more out of it. If I could have draw a line one the things that I did not want to be evaluted this woud be a thing! However, I am glad that the sense of responsibility knocked in the door at some point during this year.

I am so proud that with my IB I went through a revolution in terms of learning. IB is not just the evil one. I swear. I bet that my UWC would not have as much meaning as if I did not have my IB. Through IB I had the pleasure to study Anthropology and Theatre, both high levels, subjects that shaped my personally in a enormous way that I cannot measure in any previous point of my life. All the classes about Social Structure, Agency, Postmodernism and the critiques of it; the Marxist theory (the Goddesses-supreme and untouchable anthropological theory, because even when its critiques use Marxist terms :P). I am glad that I have done my EE in Theatre of the Oppressed and later on Brecht. Also glad of the portuguese books that I ''read'' in self-taught: ''Os transparentes'', ''O evangelho segundo Jesus Cristo'', ''Poemas de Alberto Caeiro'',’’Contos Exemplares, ''E se Obama fosse Africano'' and ''Cartas de Paulo Freire''. A harsh combination that people does when they are really inocent to believe that they will have time to read everything fully within the two years here. In addition, I will miss the calculator absurdly, since I cannot use it in my national exams. Was a beautiful relationship.

As chaotic the IB was, especially over the second year, I sincerely would have done it all again. 

I loved that experience and I cannot put in words how grateful I am for it, how much I have learned from it.

Without demagogy, I think I have been in a place in my life in which I got the meaning of education fully. Finally, I did not feel as I was an ''exam machine maker''. Finally, I felt challenged to think about what I think and to build opinions. Finally, I went to class because I was full of curiosity and wanted to learn something. Finally, I learned that a grade is a number and only it.

I am glad to finish it, because regardless of the grades in the end, I enjoy the satisfaction that I have done my best and have clear conscience that I did what I could.

Happy to finish and sad as well.

This ''agridoce'', bittersweet feeling that UWC is always promoting is just right there.

ps: without the romantic connotation, this song makes me remember this day and the vibes of the last day.

Here I go again – the blame
The guilt, the pain, the hurt, the shame
The founding fathers of our plane
That's stuck in heavy clouds of rain.

One day, baby, we'll be old
Oh, baby, we'll be old
And think of all the stories that we could have told.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRAMNWzfjcg&index=10&list=RDRkt4xU2wwhU

I might ''pack'' others ''end of UWC vibes'' during the next days.

It is time to pack, they said.

pc: May